So, technically I stole this topic, from the blog everyday in February challenge, but it was so good I couldn’t resist. Plus, I knew that today was going to be so busy I would need a topic that I would have no problem discussing at length.
Oh, there are so many thing I could say to my high school self. I had no idea what I was in for! But I’m grateful she was open and let God work in her life otherwise I wouldn’t be where I am today.
You’re 16 and terrified. Of just about everything actually. You don’t have a job, or your license (you won’t be getting that for at least a few years. Sorry! Yeah we’re still paying for that decision.). You don’t exactly know where you’re going in your faith but you want it. You want this thing people have–the joy you see in your friend Sam’s eyes, the peace your brother found, the community (though you haven’t grasped that word yet). You’re still in high school and except for that distant thing called college, you don’t think much about the future.
You’re as boy crazy as ever–there’s that one boy you particularly like. But you shouldn’t put your hopes and dreams in him. It’s not going to work out. And that’s ok. You won’t belive it at the time. But it’s best. The person you will become wouldn’t work with the person that he is, good as he is.
There are days when I would have yelled or shook my head at you. You wer so..naive. But today I just want to look in your eyes and see all that is good. Everything you couldn’t see. You’re beautiful. You’re on your way to holiness (believe it or not). His Heart is calling out and though you trip you’re slowly finding your way back to Him. You have so much potential. You have talent. You’re good enough. You never believed that. You were always so afraid. So shy. So quiet. There was so much going on in your head and your heart that you never shared with anyone. You’d been hurt too many times for that I suppose. You were confused.
The next 3 years will be crazy. Your heart will grow and change so much. Your life will never be the same. And how beautiful that is! Yet some things will always be the same–your weakness for chocolate, your desire to look pretty (though I like to think its become a bit more healthy), your need for love and community, your love of reading, how much you love your family especially your baby sister (she’s not such a baby anymore though). Your indecisiveness and shyness will fade a bit. You will become a better person. You will be bolder, stronger.
In the next 3 years you will start something amazing: your time at Benedictine. You will meet amazing women of God, become a part of a new community and become someone I think you would be proud of. Others will challenge you, but you know how far you’ve come. Don’t compare yourself to anyone but you and where you’ve been. You are the clay for the person I am and I am the clay for the person I will become.
This is the second of my 7 posts in 7 days. Check out the link-up hosted by Jen at Conversion Diary.